The NFL regular season is almost over. That means the playoffs are starting, but it also means that fantasy football leagues are inching closer to finding their winners. With that comes punishments.
JUANA SUMMERS, HOST:
OK. Here’s a question. What is the longest you could spend in a Waffle House – two hours, maybe three? Well, 32-year-old Bryan Vaccaro from Long Island spent nearly 13 hours at one.
BRYAN VACCARO: I started at 3 a.m. And then I was out of there by 2:30-3 p.m.
SUMMERS: Now before you ask yourself, like, why would anyone ever do this? He didn’t really have a choice. Vaccaro was forced to sit in the waffle house for 24 hours by members of his fantasy football league. But every waffle he ate took an hour off his time.
VACCARO: I consumed 11 Waffle House waffles.
SUMMERS: A true sacrifice right there. For those who are not familiar, some fantasy football leagues have bizarre rules if your chosen team loses. Punishments can vary from running a 5K in a business suit to even getting a tattoo. So with the NFL’s regular season inching closer to an end, we wanted to talk to some of our listeners about the craziest punishments they’ve had to endure, and y’all did not disappoint.
AIDAN BRANNIGAN: I went out January of this year, and it was hailing, and I got a harmonica and sat on my sister’s front step.
SUMMERS: That’s Aidan Brannigan, a 24-year-old living in Baltimore. He had to play an instrument outside until he made $40. The catch is, he told us, he’s never played the harmonica before.
BRANNIGAN: I can do the first 10 seconds of “Piano Man,” like pretty well. But granted, I learned it. I watched one YouTube video.
(SOUNDBITE OF HARMONICA PLAYING)
SUMMERS: And just last week, Cooper Goodman, a 16-year-old from Texas, had to run a mile while also chugging a gallon of whole milk.
(SOUNDBITE OF ARCHIVED RECORDING)
UNIDENTIFIED GROUP: (Chanting) Cooper, Cooper, Cooper.
UNIDENTIFIED PERSON: Yeah.
SUMMERS: I cannot believe I’m actually saying this right now, but just to be clear, we at NPR do not recommend doing the milk mile. You could get sick.
COOPER GOODMAN: After the first lap, I felt great. I felt good. And then once I got back, it started feeling rough, meaning, like, my stomach felt like it was going to explode.
SUMMERS: So for those who might win their fantasy leagues this season, congrats in advance and happy holidays. And for the losers, I really, really hope you like waffles.
(SOUNDBITE OF THE NEW FOOLS’ “THINGS ON MY MIND”)
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